Sunday night, I slept for about 11 hours. All four of my limbs ache. I’ve been drinking potassium- and magnesium-rich coconut water like it’s my job. I’m so tired that I just begged my cat to fetch me water because I’m finding it difficult to get up off the couch.
Yet, although I’m more exhausted than I’ve been in a long time, I feel powerful.
On Saturday, I ran my 6th half marathon. Throughout the previous week, I had doubted that I could do it. (Who am I kidding? I’ve been anxious about finishing 13.1 miles since my two month hiatus from running last summer.) Even through the final miles, when my body was on auto-pilot, I really only hoped I could do it, I didn’t know I would.
Then, I crossed the finish line. It wasn’t my fastest time by any means, but it was complete. It was powerful.
Since I seem to be living life to the fullest this summer, after lunch with my dad and husband I rushed back to Louisville to jump into the first weekend of teacher training at 502 Power Yoga.
Immediately upon arriving at the studio, I joined in an intense practice. I felt disoriented, tired, and overwhelmed. As deep as I dug to finish the race earlier that morning, I soon found I had to dig even deeper. During frog pose, a deep hip opener, I found myself staring at a puddle of sweat and tears on my mat. Again, I doubted my ability to stick with the challenge. But, again, I did.
Throughout this weekend, I had to face my self-doubt. It’s a battle I fight most days, sometimes small, sometimes tough. Yet, I’ve proven to myself in the little things as well as major accomplishments that I can persevere. For all the times I’ve read Philippians 4:13, have I really taken it to heart?
“There is nothing I cannot do in the One who strengthens me.”
Yes, God made me a powerful human being.
I know this deep inside me, but sometimes I need a reminder or two. There is a well-known African proverb that says, “If you want to go quickly, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.” Before my race, my mom tweeted me (yes, she’s that cool) to let me know she is proud of my determination. My dad came to the race, as he has for all four years I’ve run, to provide support at the start and finish lines. My husband was there for me the entire weekend, as he is every day, in the biggest way. My fellow teacher-leaders in training supported me with their energy and solidarity.
I want to go far. I want to continue down the path that God has laid before me, whatever that may be. I want to remind myself, my family, and my community that God made each and every one of us powerful. Leave self-doubt behind because you were made to do great things. How far can we go together?